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What The World Needs…Super Heroes

Riiiiight. It’s either a miracle or a hoax. Wait, that’s the same thing.

I’m just as geeky and nerdy as any other skeptic out there (except with fantastic hair, a hunky bod and tooootaly humble), so when I heard the news of a real life Magneto, I thought that was awesome pants. After all, who doesn’t like the X-Men (or as I call them X-Peeps) and the world as it is certainly needs it’s super heroes. Could 6 year old Ivan Stoiljovic of Croatia be a modern day super hero?

“Not only is Ivan the Magnet Boy supposedly able to stick up to 55 pounds of metal stuck to his torso, but his family also claims that his hands can emit heat and his mysterious ability has also given him healing powers (Huff Po).” 

Our little cherub also has incredible healing powers? That is awesome sauce. The baddass heat emitted from his grubby little hands, as the story goes, has cured his grandmother of her stomach pains and healed his neighbor who was in a tractor accident. Is your skeptic meter going off? Remember our mantra, “Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.”

Our very own Professor Xavier, the Amazing James Randi, said this, “The boy attracts attention better than metal.” Well yes, and not only that but aluminum pots, copper and silver coins…and media attention, all of which are not under the powers of magnetism. Years ago Randi investigated a Chinese dude that made the same claim.

“[He] even stuck a porcelain toilet-lid to his own son’s chest to prove how magnetic his whole family was,” Randi said. “I dusted father and son with talcum powder, and their powers evaporated.”

Ouch, reality hurts. The savage beast is soothed by music, Achilles has his stupid weak-ass heal and our modern day Magneto is taken out by common talcum powder. Notice that in all the photo’s and the vid the Croatian Magneto has no shirt on. Common sense tells us, or at least it should, that Ivan is just a typical 6 year old, dirty, stinky boy. But all is not lost…he has a Facebook page.

In the tradition of Spartacus some fellow Croatians have started We Are All Magneto Boy/Girl (and they were gender neutral which I think is very cool). On this awesome page you can view other magnetic peeps that have stuff placed on their skin and the best part, you can upload your own pictures of stuffs stuck to your skin because you have placed it there. Isn’t the interbutz wonderful.

From the WAAMBG manifesto…

“But, why the deceit and the lies…Why is a clearly obese kid not being helped but paraded about like a circus monster? Do parents want to make easy cash from their sick child, and, if so, why are the journalist not scorning, but supporting this lunacy?”

Why indeed.

How disappointing. First we didn’t have the Rapture, which means all those annoying Christians are still around and now, just like those bananas peeps keep talking about, yes we have no super heroes. Well, except for the skeptics.

Do yourself a favor, have a laugh and watch the vid. It is soooooo funny. Awesomeness.

Update: Tuesday July 12, 2011 Not to be outdone, a stinky and equally sticky boy, this time in Brazil, miraculously has the same power. Truly amazing. Thanks Huff Po.


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